“It had been a rough day, so when I walked into the party I was very chalant, despite my efforts to appear gruntled and consolate. I was furling my wieldy umbrella for the coat check when I saw her standing alone in a corner. She was a descript person, a woman in a state of total array. Her hair was kempt, her clothing shevelled, and she moved in a gainly way. I wanted desperately to meet her, but I knew I’d have to make bones about it, since I was travelling cognito. Beknownst to me, the hostess, whom I could see both hide and hair of, was very proper, so it would be skin off my nose if anything bad happened [….]” –
From “How I Met My Wife” by Jack Winter. Published 25th July 1994, The New Yorker.
Note: In linguistics, a morpheme is the smallest unit of meaning in a language. A bound morpheme is one that cannot exist in its own, like “un”.